Dead Engine Photoshoot

Invoice 005 - Dead Engine November 2021 Photoshoot

I was introduced to Dead Engine's drummer at a party through his girlfriend, a close friend of mine from work. The band had recently ditched their last photographer and were looking for someone to shoot them for an upcoming concert. I immediately leapt at the offer, not so much out of confidence but a forced habit to accept any financial opportunity. I had no experience with concert photography and given what sliver of a comfort zone I occupied, I was immediately terrified, so much so that I nearly offered to shoot the event for free. Their drummer was kind enough to refuse and I wound up actually earning more than my fees would dictate.

The first stage of the commission was to photograph Dead Engine for promotional material. Their venue required some sort of group shot that they could post on their website, and the band had delayed sending anything. They nearly resorted to using their smartphone so I scrambled to select a location. I remembered having a previous interest in an abandoned Fry's Electronics superstore. This particular location was stylized as an Aztec temple and I thought the bizarre aesthetic would be an interesting backdrop for a band photo. In retrospect, other than the empty parking garage, I in no way took advantage of the scenery enough to distinguish it as an abandoned Fry's.

The photoshoot itself went smoothly despite my nervousness. I had the advantage of Dead Engine being relatively inexperienced in this sort of thing, and Sam joined me to ease my anxiety. I remember watching other portrait photographers discuss the importance of speaking to clients while shooting in order to make them more relaxed and aware of the process, and so I made an active effort, as corny as it was, to talk like a model photographer (lots of "oh yeahs!" and "that looks great"). It was very much a persona I was putting on to get the best results, and I felt detached from myself, like I was inhabiting a more confident and sociable foreign body. It was the only way I could deal with the stressful situation.

I had a set list of shot ideas that I planned out beforehand so we could jump into position and complete the photoshoot in less than an hour. I had learned better after fidgeting around tediously for three hours with Sam in my studio class. The band also gave one or two suggestions for shots, and although a little stiff, they were relatively easy to model. However, it was apparent right away which of my planned shots would not look good.

Dead Engine gravitated towards the shots inside the parking garage and one angle in particular. Despite insisting that they didn't have a specific aesthetic in mind, I got the sense that what they really wanted was a blunt, expressionless, and gritty metal band photo, which was why their imposing stances in the dim parking garage appealed to their tastes. And so I tried to play that up in editing with darker, bluish colors and lots of punchy contrast. Outdoor shots were much more difficult to implement into that style, which is why I suspect they showed less interest in those. Keep in mind, these band members are relatively quiet and unassuming so it was difficult to gauge any criticism they had with my results.

Killdeer

October 23rd, 2021

Thanks to a generous stimulus check and after much deliberating, I upgraded to a Sony a7 III Mirrorless camera. Purchasing photo equipment is a whole separate tangent that's probably not nearly as interesting to most of you, but to make a long story short, I tried avoiding the pitfall that many photographers make of thinking they can buy their way to better photos. I had been able to make due for years with an older Nikon DSLR and so I was very conservative in selecting a new model. The reality was that no amount of new features would transform me into a professional, and I was confident enough in my skills to know that the only thing that would elevate my work was practice and technique.

I first tested my new Sony camera at Kosta's baptism, but at that point, I was frustrated at my unfamiliarity with the model. I neglected to practice with it before the event, overestimating my skill at learning new equipment. I was frantically searching button layouts online during the ceremony and realizing too late that a RAW image in a newer camera model took up an absurd amount of space on a memory card.

By the time I traveled to Monterey with my friends, I was relatively more comfortable with the Sony. It helped that there was no added pressure of a limited time frame, and I once again sunk into the creative lull I spoke of in Stupid. I photographed occasionally and only at the usual subjects: birds, textures, Sam, etc.

I hadn't visited the Monterey Bay Aquarium in at least 10 years, not since a fifth grade field trip, and shooting inside brought me back to some of my earliest photo memories. I thought of the exhibits that I was shooting now, and how much had changed in that period of time. I stepped into one of the larger rooms with the massive fish tank and the tourists gathered around the manta rays and sharks, and I was reminded of an early shot I was particularly proud of in fifth grade. This time around, I just stood there and looked at the fish, smiling at the memory.

Apart from the aquarium, we traveled along the Asilomar Trail near the Point Pinos Lighthouse, where a staff member and San Jose State alumni regaled extensively on his years at the lighthouse, his interest in photography, and how glued young people were to their phones.

We closed the day relaxing on the shores of Moss Beach as Western Sandpipers darted back and forth along the wet sand, searching for food.

Kosta's Baptism

Invoice 004 - Kosta Mantzas Baptism Ceremony August 2021